You Can Find Comfort Here
by Blooming Memories
Summary: Eren is having doubts about himself, facing frustration and worries while desiring someone he could talk to about it. Anything for a little reassurance that he's not a monster. He definitely can't worry his friends, Eren and Mikasa, with this, though. Maybe...just maybe, Levi would be the right one for this? Slash. Oneshot.


The deafening silence resonating throughout the practically pitch black basement ringed into his ears painfully, Eren quietly sitting on the edge of the twin-sized bed while Rivaille guarded him as usual, not finding it necessary or of importance to speak more than needed.

"Eren."

"Y-Yes, sir!?" He exclaimed, instantly whipping his head towards the direction of his corporal, an almost unnerved expression painted on his features like a canvas, caused by the sudden velvety, yet terrifyingly commanding tenor that had sprang into the immensely quiet atmosphere.

"Go to sleep, unless you enjoy becoming unconscious by someone else's hands."

At this, Eren winced, fully aware that Rivaille would execute the action thoroughly and without hesitation- without so much of a blink. Had this been any other day Eren would have, with no doubt, ran for his bed and pretend to sleep if necessary to avoid a possible beating from his superior. However, this wasn't like any other day. Dark thoughts, doubts, and worries had been getting to him for the past few hours, and no matter how much he rolled around in the bed, wrinkling up the sheets that provided warmth and supposed comfort in the process, not one ounce of his being could dare be tired when these thoughts of his were eating away at the crevices of his mind.

"Sir, I-I can't." He spoke hesitantly, his shoulders unconsciously raising upwards and cowering.

Rivaille simply arched an eyebrow though, sighing as he no longer leaned on the wall and instead stood up straight, calmly walking towards his cadet. "I see. So you really are a masochist then, huh?"

The brunette instantly raised his arms as defense, clearly knowing what the others next actions would be if he did not correct his statement properly. "N-No, sir, that's not it! I just-"

"When you're in my presence, speak up with your head held high, or otherwise your words are not worth listening to. I don't have time to decipher your mumbles, goddamn brat."

No reply was given after that, Eren's head hanging low and brown locks cascading down almost like an umbrella, hiding his current expression. The silence once again ensued. Yes, Levi was a man that could be trusted; one that did not go back on his word and always seemed to have knowledge of what to do in compromising situations.

Because of this, Eren found himself asking for the captains advice at times, perhaps even sharing little things about himself in very subtle ways—though he doubted Rivaille cared much. In the end however, he always ended up wondering whether these things he shared were truly him.

"I'm not one to repeat things twice, Eren."

The reminder was enough to will himself to part his lips, expression still a mystery.

"Sir…who am I?"

"Haah? What are you going on about now?"

The knuckles of Eren's fists had now gone white from how tightly squeezed they were, placing them on his own lap from frustration. "Who am I, truly?"

"How should I know? You of all people should know who you are. I don't see why this concerns me."

"This arm…", Eren exclaimed almost instantly after Levi's reply, lifting his head up and making eye contact. The pained and unsure expression in his verdant hues did not go unnoticed by the other, though he chose to ignore it for the time being. Eren's arm was now raised towards Levi's line of vision, showing it to him as if to make his point.

"This arm, and…my leg, they were both bitten off. Are these…even mine? Do they belong to me? I'm….Am I even considered a human being anymore? I've become the one thing I wanted to kill most in this world. I'm a monster. One day, I'll lose control and kill those who I care fo—**OW**!"

Levi's hand had violently smacked his head downwards, a loud yelp leaving Eren's lips as he grimaced in pain. Like second instinct, Eren's own hand was _placed_ on his head, unlike the corporal, rubbing it slowly to ease the sharp sting.

"So loud, shut up."

Of course. Clearly, he wasn't in his right mind to say such a thing, especially in front his corporal. What on earth was he thinking?

"Listen here, you damn brat. If that arm and leg is attached to your body, it belongs to you._"_

_"_E-Eh…?_"_

_"_You don't kill people intentionally and eat them, do you? Then you're obviously not the monster you hate most, so stop whining._"_

_"_…_"_

_"_If you ever lose control and try to harm your friends, I assure you, I won't hesitate to end you right where you stand. I never go back on my word._" _

And with that, Rivaille walked back to his original position, leaning on the wall behind him, face monotone and uninterested as always.

'_Ah_' was all that passed through Eren's mind at the moment. So Rivaille had his own way of comforting his allies too, huh? Albeit all the insults thrown in the process, but nonetheless, just the thought of his corporal doing such a thing had somehow cheered him up a little.

_Maybe…this is more than just respect and admiration for him._

"Sir…"

"What now?" Rivaille replied, irritation practically dripping from his tongue.

Eren sported a look of gratitude, yet solid respect and seriousness all at the same time.

"Thank you."

_"_...Tch, shut up and sleep already. My blood cells will die out if I hear your voice a minute longer._"_


End file.
